Wednesday, December 26, 2012

Warning!

I did not know this...


When you drink vodka over ice, it can give you kidney failure..

When you drink rum over ice, it can give you liver failure.



When you drink whiskey over ice, it can give you heart problems.

When you drink gin over ice, it can give you brain problems.



Apparently, ice is really bad for you.

Warn all your friends.



Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Walk With Me While I Age

I hope this poem has the same effect on you as it did me.

"Walk With Me While I Age", a beautiful poem about growing older.
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"shit, I forgot the words."

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

Elderly Woman Joke

An elderly Lady called 911 on her mobile phone to report that her car has been broken into.

She is hysterical as she explains her situation to the operator: "They've stolen the stereo, the steering wheel, the brake pedal and even the accelerator!" she cried.

The operator said, "Stay calm An officer is on the way."

A few minutes later, the Officer radios in. "Disregard.." He says, "She got in the back-seat by mistake.."

Thursday, May 31, 2012

Best Friend's Job

I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.