Thursday, January 27, 2011

How is Norma?

HOW IS NORMA?
A sweet grandmother telephoned St. Joseph 's Hospital. She timidly asked,
"Is it possible to speak to someone who can tell me how a patient is doing?"
The operator said, "I'll be glad to help, dear. What's the name and room number of the
patient?"
The grandmother in her weak, tremulous voice said, "Norma Findlay, Room 302."
The operator replied, "Let me put you on hold while I check with the nurse's station for that
room."
After a few minutes, the operator returned to the phone and said,
"I have good news. Her nurse just told me that Norma is doing well.. Her
blood pressure is fine; her blood work just came back normal and her
physician, Dr. Cohen, has scheduled her to be discharged tomorrow."
The grandmother said,
"Thank you. That's wonderful. I was so worried. God bless you for the good
news."
The operator replied, "You're more than welcome. Is Norma your daughter?"
The grandmother said, "No, I'm Norma Findlay in Room 302. No one tells me anything."

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Enjoy Life Now!

When you have an

'I Hate My Job day'


[Even if you're retired or you're a housewife, you sometimes have those days]


Try this out:

Stop at your pharmacy and go to the
thermometer section and purchase
a rectal thermometer made by
Johnson & Johnson.

Be very sure you get this brand.

When you get home, lock your
doors, draw the curtains and
disconnect the phone so
you will not be disturbed.


Change into very comfortable
clothing and sit in your favorite
chair. Open the package and
remove the thermometer.

Now, carefully place it on a table
or a surface so that it will not
become chipped or broken.


Now the fun part begins.

Take out the literature from
the box and read it carefully.

You will notice that in small
print there is this statement:


"Every Rectal Thermometer
made by Johnson & Johnson
is personally tested

and then sanitized."


Now, close your eyes and repeat
out loud five times,' I am so glad
I do not work in the thermometer
quality control department at
Johnson & Johnson.'


HAVE A NICE DAY; AND REMEMBER,
THERE IS ALWAYS SOMEONE ELSE
WITH A JOB THAT IS MORE OF A
PAIN IN THE BUTT THAN YOURS!



if you haven't got a smile on your face
and laughter in your heart...

Maybe you should go and work
for Johnson and Johnson!




Enjoy life now - It has an expiration date!