Groom to Minister Joke

This is another joke from Joel Osteen, that I found humorous.

I heard about this groom. At the wedding rehearsal, he said to the minister "I'll make a deal with ya. If during the vowels you'll leave out all of that love, honor and obey stuff, I'll give you a hundred dollars."He slipped a hundred dollar bill in the minister's hand and walked away with a smile.

The next day during the ceremony, the minister said to him "Do you promise to bow down before your wife, to take her breakfast in bed, to fulfill her every desire."

He gulped in astonishment, and said in a weak voice "I do." Then he whispered in the minister's ear "I thought we had a deal?"

The minister handed him back his money and said "Your wife made me a much better offer."

Bear & Minister Religion Joke

One my favorite things about watching Joel Osteen, is that he starts out each episode with something funny. Today, I was watching an older episode, and really enjoyed this joke.

Bear & Minister Religion Joke

"I heard about this minister, he'd been out hunting all day long.

He searched and searched through the woods, with no sign of a bear.

Finally, in frustration, he through his gun down on the ground.

He went down to the stream to cool off.

About that time he sees this huge grizzly bear running at him, full force, about a hundred yards away.

He fell down on his knees and said "God, I need protection. Please convert this bear into a Christian."

Miraculously, the bear froze in his tracks, lifted both paws to the Heavens and said "Lord, thank you for this food I am about to eat."